


Five Fake Dates

by jujukittychick



Series: Merry Trope-mas [16]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Chris and Stiles keep getting thrown together, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Pre-Slash, So is Chris, Stiles Stilinski is a Little Shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:34:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28102506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jujukittychick/pseuds/jujukittychick
Summary: Chris and Stiles keep getting thrown together to play boyfriends when needed...because reasons apparently.  And while the guys certainly don’t mind, they’re not sure how much is pretend any more.
Relationships: Chris Argent/Stiles Stilinski
Series: Merry Trope-mas [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2055879
Comments: 14
Kudos: 200
Collections: 1 Million Words' A to Z Challenge





	Five Fake Dates

**Author's Note:**

> For 1_million_words a-z challenge - F, Merry Trope-mas Day #15: Fake Dating
> 
> Lol so kind of a flexible version of "dates" but I liked how this came out. No real warnings, mostly just fluff and these two being little shits either to each other or someone else occasionally.
> 
> Funny story, this is the second go at this prompt. I started the first one, also a Chris/Stiles, then realized it was going to turn out a lot longer than I was planning so decided to do something else. Also, I liked the title I came up with which would not work for the other one lol

~ 1 ~

“Why were we paired up again?” Stiles leaned his head back against the passenger seat of Chris’ SUV, rolling his head to look at the other man.

“Because apparently everyone else in the pack is dating someone and ‘it would be weird’.” Chris rolled his eyes and looked at the teen, hesitating a moment before asking, “Is it a problem?”

“Huh? Oh, oh no, nothing like that. It just seems a little random. Why didn’t they pair you up with Peter? I mean, honestly, I’d ship it.”

“You’d...What…” Chris just stared as Stiles gave him a blatant once over. Shaking his head, he rubbed a hand over his face, “Nevermind, I really don’t think I want to know.”

Stiles cackled and waved toward the building they were parked in front of. “So what are we doing at Jungle?”

“One of the victims’ partners said a guy was acting really strange and creeped the two of them out because he kept trying to grind on the victim. The partner said he noticed him hitting on several, quote, _twinks_.”

Stiles' face fell and he gave Chris a half-hearted glare. “I’m playing bait.”

“You're playing bait.”

Stiles huffed and hopped out of the car, meeting Chris in front of it as he hugged Chris’ arm, fluttering his eyelashes at him, “You’re buying me dinner later, dear.”

“Well, of course, what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t take you to dancing _and_ dinner, babe.”

Stiles rolled his eyes, the two of them laughing as they joined the line to get in,

~ 2 ~

“Why didn’t we take my SUV?” Chris shifted on the cracked vinyl seat, trying to find a comfortable position.

Stiles gave him a look and petted his steering wheel. “ _Because_ your car looks like you’re either a drug lord or a fed and we’re trying to be inconspicuous.”

Chris gave Stiles a very long look. “Stiles your Jeep is bright powder blue. How…”

Stiles flapped his hand, “Yes, but it’s a classic and even though it is the best Jeep ever,” he cooed at his Jeep and patted the door lovingly, “it is not in pristine condition. So it fits in the neighborhood.”

Looking around at the beat up junker cars that were in every single drive way, he had to concede the point, “Fair enough.” Shifting once more, he glanced back at Stiles, “So, why didn’t you take Derek or one of the others with you?”

“Because apparently everyone else has a built-in stakeout buddy in their significant other nowadays so I’m s.o.l. when it comes to these kinds of things. And, honestly, we’re on the hunt for something that burns down houses, do you really think I need to put Derek or Peter through that? I’ve finally gotten them to start acting like halfway normal people a couple days a week.”

Chris winced, but nodded...then shifted again. “Next stakeout we’re taking my car, I don’t care if I have to drive it through the Preserve first. I need room to stretch out and move. And seats without springs stabbing me in the ass.”

“Yeah, if you’re going to get stabbed in the ass in a car, you really should have good seats you can spread out on.” Stiles smirked, glancing over at the older man.

Chris leaned over, draping an arm across the back of Stiles’ seat, letting his voice drop, “Mmhmmm, you know it’s not a good date unless you wind up stretched out in the backseat trying to get nailed.” Chris watched the blush climb up Stiles’ pale neck and over his face and ears and chuckled. “Come on, let’s go see if we can find this thing on foot.”

~ 3 ~

“Oh my Goooooood! Who thought this was a good idea?”

Chris looked over at Stiles who was tugging at the bowtie he was wearing and batted his hands away from it and resisted tugging at his own. “Somebody who didn’t ask our opinions.”

“I’m betting on Lydia. This has her mark all over it.” Stiles tilted his head, considering, “Or Peter, he likes being obnoxious and letting people know he’s better than them too.”

Chris thought about that and nodded, sipping his champagne as he looked around the crowded ballroom. Now that the town was more or less not a Hellmouth more than once or twice a year and they had a stable pack, apparently that meant socializing with the nearby supernatural residents to establish goodwill or something. As a hunter, he’d had no clue that that was actually a thing that happened with established packs. He was really kind of wishing he _still_ didn’t know.

Stiles tugged at his bowtie again and plucked Chris’ glass out of his hand, downing the remaining champagne in one go, ignoring Chris’ disapproving look. “I don’t understand why I’m here. I’m not good with people, everybody knows this.”

Chris stared at the teen, realizing he actually meant that. “You’re the emissary in training, Stiles, you’re kind of important. I don’t understand why _I’m_ here.”

Stiles shrugged and swapped out his empty glass for a full one with a passing waiter. Taking a healthy drink, he handed the glass back over to Chris. “I could give you the party line about hunter representation and facilitating peaceful interactions. Or I could tell you the truth in that if I have to suffer so do as many other people as possible.”

“You’re all heart.”

“You know it.”

“ _Christopher_ , there you are. I’ve been looking all over for you.”

Christopher’s eyes widened and he started looking for escape routes, muttering, “Shit.”

Stiles watched some blonde cougar head their way, dress just a little too tight to qualify as appropriate for that particular gathering with a plunging neckline showing off her well done, though obviously expensive, upgrades. As she stopped in front of them, Stiles leaned against Chris’ side, Chris arm draping over his shoulders. Peeking up at him, he asked innocently, “Friend of yours?”

Chris glanced down at the teen, recognizing the chaotic look in his eyes and decided to see what he’d do. “We were introduced earlier.” Looking back up at the woman he offered his customer service smile, “Though honestly, with how many people I’ve met tonight, I can’t remember who you are. Rachel?”

The woman’s face kind of froze at the lack of interest in his voice, “Ramona. And you’ve brought your son? I thought I heard you had a daughter too?”

Chris felt Stiles’ body tense just the slightest and watched the chaos about to happen eagerly, he’d pegged the woman as a gold digger of the first order when she had first been introduced to him and she wasn’t subtle about it.

Stiles gave the woman a bright friendly smile and shook his head, “Oh, no, Rhonda, I’m not Chris’ son, though he is my Daddy.” Stiles watched Chris choke on the sip of champagne he’d just taken, was pretty sure he could hear Peter cackling like the villain he was somewhere, and saw Derek trip into a table, not to mention the astonished giggles he could hear from those with super hearing in the room. Giving her exposed cleavage and the heavy strand of jewels resting on top of them a very pointed look, he winked at her, “I’m sure you can understand.”

“Oh, baby boy, what am I going to do with you?” Chris was trying not to laugh at the horrified look on the woman’s face and smacked Stiles’ ass just hard enough to make a point. And if it also made him yelp and jump and knock Chris’ champagne glass out of his hand, spilling its contents across their shoes, well, that was just icing on the cake.

Stiles let his voice go husky as he cuddled up even closer to the older man, “Well since I got us all dirty too, I guess you better take me home and punish me.” Oops, yeah, there went Derek crashing into a waiter and he could see Scott’s horrified look from all the way across the room. Though Peter and Erica were apparently clinging to each other to stay upright they were laughing so hard.

“Good idea. Have a nice evening, Wanda.” Ushering the brat outside through a side door he had spotted, he made a beeline toward his car. Want to head back to mine and order in some actual food? I’ve got some clothes that should fit you.”

“Fuck, yeah. All of that.”

Chris was nice enough to make sure there were no curbs or oncoming cars or people around when he offered, “Though if you still think you need to be punished, I’m sure I can arrange that too.” Laughing as Stiles tripped over his own feet, arms flailing as he tried to keep his balance, Chris watched him blush bright red.

“You’re horrible.”

“You know it, baby.” 

~ 4 ~

“I’m going to kill someone!”

“That is generally how these kinds of nights end, yes.”

Stiles glared at Chris who seemed to be completely at ease with their midnight hike through the Preserve. “Why are _we_ the only ones out here hunting this thing, huh?”

Chris glanced over at the teen, reaching out to snag the waistband of his jeans to keep him from faceplanting after tripping over a tree root...again. “Because, besides Derek and Peter, neither of us have an actual day job apparently. And they’re hunting this thing from the other entrance.”

“Well that’s bullshit.”

Chris shrugged, well used to middle of the night hunts with no notice. “Cheer up. It’s a nice night out, the stars are shining, the moon is full, and nothing has tried to chase, attack, maim, or eat us yet.”

Stiles stopped and gave the man a look. “Seriously? You need to work on your priorities, dude.”

Chris laughed and grabbed his hand, tugging him along again. “What, you don’t think it’s romantic?”

“Picnics in the sunny afternoon are romantic. Me tripping through the forest at night is not.”

“Didn’t those harpies attack in the morning?”

“Which time?”

“And the dryad was definitely during the day. So were the gnomes.”

Stiles shuddered, “Don’t remind me, I still can’t look at my neighbor’s yard without cringing. Besides, I didn’t know this was supposed to be a romantic outing.”

Chris was silent for a long moment, squeezing the hand that was still holding his, their fingers twined together. Pulling Stiles towards him, he looked down at his wide-eyed stare, “Would it be so bad if it was?”

Feeling the blush creeping up his cheeks, Stiles ducked his head, looking out toward the forest, “No...no, I don’t think it would.”

~ 5 ~

Chris opened his door carefully, hearing a very odd knock, both heavy and slow. As soon as the door opened, Stiles faceplanted against his chest. Ah, he had been banging his head on the door.

“Why so early????”

“Because we have lots of exciting research to do.”

“You’re evil, you know that?”

“You have mentioned it before, yes. Come on, it’s not that bad, and I have a whole pot of coffee ready for you.” Chris looked at the adorably sleepy boy in his arms. They’d planned to go on a couple of dates since that night in the forest but something always came up that they had to reschedule. And, quite frankly, Chris was tired of waiting. Getting Stiles settled at the dining room table, he set his laptop next to him with a notebook and pen and grabbed some brochures he’d found earlier in the week.

Stiles looked at the laptop miserably, all he wanted was some time off, seriously. Glancing up at Chris as he fixed two cups of coffee, he sighed. And he really wanted a chance to explore what might be happening between the two of them. “So, what are we researching? Maynads? Demons? Kappas?”

Setting the coffee down in front of Stiles, fixed just the way he liked, Chris sat down next to him and slid over the brightly illustrated brochures. “Bed and breakfast places in Northern California.”

Stiles stared wide-eyed from the brochures back up at Chris, “Seriously?” He hesitated before getting his hopes up, because with his luck… ”Haunted?”

Chris smiled softly and shook his head. Standing up, he couldn’t resist dropping a kiss on the top of Stiles’ head as the teen looked down at the brochures before heading back into the kitchen just in time for the oven timer to go off. Pulling out the pan of cinnamon rolls, he carefully removed two and drizzled icing over them. “Nope, no hauntings, infestations, or anything else. Just a place to get away for a couple of days, just the two of us. If you want…”

Looking at the sinful looking cinnamon roll placed in front of him, the perfectly prepared coffee, the brochures, Stiles laughed in disbelief. “Wow, you really do love me.”

Chris reached out, taking Stiles’ hand. “Yeah...yeah I really think I do.”

The awed expression on Stiles’ face was almost as sweet as the first kiss they shared.


End file.
